flawed memories

sitting on the bus, light is falling through the trees
i am asking myself: is this it? are these the moments i will remember one day
when i am thinking back to college days and being young
i feel the need to write down every thought
cause it is so easy to forget and loose

all those small yet so significant moments
all those words spoken, glances and smiles exchanged
all this music that is like nutrition to my soul
all those books that touch my heart

i want to capture it all
the good and the bad, all the feelings that i have
sometimes i look back
and even those days so full of excitement, freedom, peace and joy
and those deep in pain, desperation, sadness
are now so far away, blurred images, like dreams i can barely remember

i don't want to forget
and i don't want to be forgotten
afraid of oblivion

time is at the essence...

exams are around the corner...
so most of my life is revision at the moment.
but of course there are the little things in life,
that make life worth living, even when my brain feels like exploding.

the sunshine.
drinking coffee.
knitting.
eating waffles.
enjoying some red wine while
watching "not going out".
listening to frank sinatra, foster the people
and this tune:



in 4 weeks i'm done! hurray.

life lately

a couple of weeks ago my dear friend Hannah introduced me to "daily grace". she is a video blogger and absolutely hilarious.
today she explains how to study.

clashing intentions

it's one of those days.
some people, or some men misinterpret kindness.
and then i feel guilty for being nice.
and i rack my brain
'did i do something that might have given a wrong idea?'
but i do not want to apologise

for laughing at his jokes

and looking into his eyes when he was talking.

and so i am sitting here trying to figure out
what i can do about this unsolved misunderstanding
without losing a friend.
again.

on thinking, ignorance and happiness

'Amighty God! Thou who holdest in Thy hand the minds of men, deliver us from the fatal arts and sciences... give us back ignorance, innocence, and poverty, which alone can makes us happy and are precious in Thy sight'. 
-Rousseau

sometimes i have pity on people who never experienced the exhilarating feeling you get while reading literature, thinking about political issues, and mediating on philosophical questions.
but to constantly scrutinize, question and doubt all things can make one quite melancholic and even desperate. it seems so hard to find answers, to fully understand.
life probably is easier for an ignorant person but not as deep. and i guess melancholy is a price worth paying for the blitheness that arises from pondering about life, love and god.

Heysham

living #3

deepening friendships.

drinking milk.

listening to snow patrol's album "fallen empires". over and over again.

early morning jogging rounds.

meeting great people.

playing the guitar.

feels like life keeps getting better and better.

source: over there