Building a life.

On a walk through Lancaster last sunday

I love this expression. Building a life.
That's what I'm doing. Or what I want to do.
I want to find out, who I really am, what I want, what makes me happy, what inspires me.

I believe being here is just the right place to do this.
Far away from home, from all the people that know me and love me - but also sometimes put labels on me.
Here everything is new, like a white, blank page and I can find out what the title of this chapter of my life will be.
Even though it is scary sometimes and I still feel like a kid, that wants to hide in the arms of their parents and even though I feel alone sometimes - it is good to be here. It is the right way.
I am learning a lot about myself. And I enjoy the solitude. I enjoy my own company, hearing myself breathe, finally becoming calm and just enjoying life.
And there is this exhilarating feeling inside of me - the feeling of being independent. Being free. I do not have to make anyone happy except for myself.

The other day I read a quote on one of my favorite blogs, little reminders of love (I think I've mentioned it before) and it says:

"there are days i drop words of comfort on myself like falling leaves and remember that it is enough to be taken care of by myself."

-brian andreas

Exactly.